Kids who communicate well, handle emotions effectively and build healthy relationships aren't just naturally skilled at social interactions. They've learned these skills from their parents or trusted adults.
I've worked with thousands of kids and families, often helping them navigate tough moments. People skills — like empathy, communication, boundary-setting and conflict resolution — are crucial during life's biggest challenges. They also shape how kids handle everyday stress, friendships and family dynamics.
Here are six things that parents who raise kids with strong people skills do on a regular basis:
1. They have honest, developmentally appropriate discussions
Rather than shielding their kids and avoiding difficult topics like illness, death or big life changes, these parents build trusting relationships by approaching tough conversations with openness, honesty and compassion.
They use simple, clear language and invite questions, teaching children that it's okay to talk about uncomfortable topics and to seek support.
Parents who create a home environment where kids feel safe expressing their thoughts and emotions raise children who have an easier time communicating and advocating for themselves.
2. They help their kids name and process big emotions
These parents are comfortable naming and showing their own emotions in front of their kids, including joy and playfulness in difficult times.
When their children feel frustrated, sad or overwhelmed, they don't dismiss those emotions or say things like, "Don't cry," "It's not a big deal," or "You're okay." Instead, they validate their child's experience:
This teaches kids that all feelings are okay, helps them learn and practice coping strategies to regulate their emotions, and allows them to feel safe expressing themselves.
3. They foster empathy and perspective-taking
When conflicts or challenges arise, these parents don't force quick apologies. Instead, they guide their children to consider the other person's feelings, asking questions like:
This helps kids develop perspective-taking skills, gives them a better understanding of what's within their control, and shows them how both their actions and external factors impact others — ultimately making their apologies more meaningful and their relationships stronger.
4. They encourage problem-solving and boundary-setting
Rather than immediately stepping in to fix conflicts or ease discomfort, these parents empower their kids to navigate challenges themselves. Instead of dictating solutions, they ask:
They help their children recognize when they need to set a boundary, teaching them to express limits clearly and respectfully:
By combining problem-solving with boundary-setting, parents help their kids develop the confidence to advocate for themselves and work through social challenges. They also recognize that not every situation has a clear solution or a quick fix — and in those moments, they focus on providing support.
5. They prepare kids for what to expect
Instead of pushing their kids into new interactions and hoping they'll figure it out, these parents set kids up for success by preparing them ahead of time and giving them opportunities to practice.
They help their kids feel more confident by:
6. They use play to teach social and emotional skills
Play isn't just about having fun. The parents I've seen raise socially and emotionally skilled kids aren't afraid to be silly, but they also understand that play is a child's natural way of processing emotions, working through challenges, and building relationships. They:
By valuing play, these parents establish connection and trust while helping their kids develop social and emotional skills that are critical for their growth and development — and will serve them for a lifetime.
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